The question I’m asked most often is some version of: How do you do it all?
The honest answer is twofold.
First: I don’t. Social media is a reel, not a real. You’re seeing highlights, not the dropped balls, the half-finished to-do lists, or the nights when takeout counts as a win.
But second—and this is the part I don’t downplay: I have been able to build a fulfilling career, maintain a rich social life, nurture a deeply connected marriage, teach and practice physical movement, and protect time for creative work and hobbies because I am militant about systems.
I automate as much of my life as possible so the free space in my calendar and my brain can be used to create, to connect, and to be fully present for joy.
Below are the systems I romanticize—the quiet, unsexy scaffolding that keeps me sane, and it is my deepest hope that they might do the same for you!
Establish Your Default Week
Eliminate decision fatigue by assigning standard weekly tasks to the same days. For me, that looks like this:
Monday: laundry + groceries
Tuesday: errands / returns
Wednesday: wash sheets + tidy house
Thursday: beauty treatments (aka the everything shower)
Friday: appointments
Sunday: plan out the next week
review my calendar
create my weekly task list
book my movement classes
Set a Weekly Menu
This allows me to create rolodex of easy, 30-minute meals and ensures the basic ingredients are always stocked in our pantry. Here’s ours:
Monday: comfort food
Tuesday: mexican
Wednesday: bowls
Thursday: italian
Sunday: pizza + salad
Create a Shared Family Calendar
If it matters, it lives on the calendar! We use Google Calendar with separate colors for family events, my events, and Carter’s events. This visibility keeps us organized, but also provides insight into when one might need the other’s help during a particularly busy day.
Download Your Grocery Store App
Almost all major groccery stores have an app you can create a list within. Carter and I share one account and add to our list in real time. That way, the weekly shop is always holisitic, and, if anyone runs in for a last minute grab, they can also pick-up any other needed items on the fly.
Conduct a Daily Inbox Sweep
Set eyes on every piece of correspondence and assign it one of three* labels:
Address today (I label in “yellow”)
Save for later (I label in “orange”)
Awaiting a response (I label in “purple”)
*I also use this time to unsubscribe from any promotional emails I no longer wish to recieve.
Log Day-to-Day Spending
It’s not fun, but this is the greatest way to gain insight to your spending data and ultimately make educated decisions with your finances.
This is the spreadsheet I use. I love the categorical insights!
Batch Schedule Appointments
Remove the drip of constant rescheduling, and knock out all your recurring appointments for the year in one sitting. For me, that looks like:
Dog grooming
Hair cut + color
Botox
Dentist
Doctors
Use a Garment Rack to Plan Outfits
On Sundays, I like to set out my outfits for the entire week (even lounge sets for work from home days or nights in!) on this amazing garment rack that is under $35! It not only helps me internalize my upcoming schedule, but allows me to shop my closet. I also recommend keeping a running Pinterest board of outfit inspiration you would like to replicate!
Select One Brand per Beauty Category
This one may be controversial, but I recommend selecting one brand for each of your beauty categories (skincare, makeup, hair, self tan). Most brands usually have designed systems that are meant to be utilized together, and this saves you from the mental arithmatic of determining which items are complementary, duplicative, or, at worst, antithetical. Also, despite what Big Beauty wants you to believe, you do not need the newest, latest product release at all times.
I have landed on:
Chanel makeup
La Mer skincare
Crown Affair hair products
Dyson hair tools
Beauty by Earth self tanner
Have Signatures
I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: The less decisions you have to make, the better. So, when you’re running late to your appointment, need to restock your home, or just looking to focus on connecting with loved ones, a chic tried and true you can automatically land on is a mental health gift.
Some of my signatures are:
Scent - Baccarat Rouge 540
Nail color - OPI Red Head Ahead
Candle - NEST New York Grapefruit
Cocktail - Champagne
Coffee - Nespresso Melozio
Find Your Staples + Buy in Every Color
When you spend the financial and mental capital to discover peices that work with your body, lifestyle, and budget, stop the search and invest in every single color!
Some of my workhorses that fall within this category:
Beyond Yoga Spacedye Slim Racerback Cropped Tank + Spacedye At Your Leisure High Waisted Midi Legging
Purchase Vitamin Packs
An easy way to ensure you’re getting all the nutrients you need without analyzing gaps. I am personally a fan of Perelel Health.
Subscribe to Repeat Purchases
If you buy it more than twice a year, automate it!
30 Minutes of Professional Development a Day
Think of this carve out as compounding intelligence for your future. As part of my duties as a lawyer, I am literally ethically obligated to stay up to date on the newest laws, legal trends, and technologies, so regular education allows me to make proactive decisions instead of reactive responses. I firmly believe this approach can apply to any career or interest!
Stay Planning Something Exciting for the Next Quarter
This is my most “fun” system, but don’t be fooled—it’s scientifically backed! Research shows that dopamine spikes more consistently during anticipation for an exciting event than even during the event itself. By always having something in the next 6-8 weeks to look forward to and organize, such as a trip, dinner party, or girl’s night out, your happiness receptors will stay at play and you will keep fizz in your day-to-day.
Run Your Dishwasher Every Night
This is one of my most dreaded chores, but by keeping loads more manageable (i.e., easily handled in the time it takes my coffee to brew), I find the task easier to tackle and prevents the stress of a overflowing sink.
Establish Boundaries + Default Responses
The easiest said but hardest done system. When you develop boundaries and automatic responses to protect those values, you once again provide your mind much needed relief.
For example, I limit myself to one weeknight activity a week. This boundary is so important for me because while my social self always wants to see friends and try new things or places, if I don’t protect restful routines at home, I will quickly burnout.
So, when I’ve already committed to my weeknight activity, I don’t have to go through the mental anguish of debating my response when another invite comes through. I can respond with a polite but firm no, and try to reschedule for another time!
Nightly Sweet Treat
Every single night. Non-negotiable. Think of this as your final system to bookend a day of efficiencies, with all your open space available for joy!
This is the post I needed so much this week! Thank you so so much. Would you ever consider sharing how you and your husband divide up household tasks?